Most men are shadows of their former selves that have died a long time ago.There was a time when they were passionate and adventurous. There was a time when they wanted to conquer the world and show everyone that they have what it takes to be a real man. Unfortunately, this time is long gone. Along the way, something happened. Life happened.
They didn’t achieve their goals on the first try and then gave up on their dreams without ever trying again. As a result, they came to the conclusion that their dream of living an extraordinary life was nothing but an unrealistic illusion. These are the same men who complain that no women are interested in them.
On the other hand, there are guys who didn’t give up on their dreams and who continue to improve and to challenge themselves every day, no matter how often they fall down and have to get up again. These are highly desirable men who get the job, the relationships, and the life they want. Let’s have a look at the 10 characteristics that you need to have if you want to become one of those men.
1. They reveal their authentic self
Highly desirable men don’t have to hide behind a mask. They don’t have to pretend to be someone they are not. They know that the people they meet want to get to know their real selves and not some fake mask that they put on in order to hide their insecurities.
While other men try to convince the people around them that they are perfect in the hope that nobody sees their internal conflicts, a desirable men accepts his vulnerable side and isn’t afraid to show it to the world. Real men have the courage to accept their vulnerable side, while boys continue to hide behind a mask.
2. They treat other people with respect
Respect is a two way street. The people around you will treat you with the same respect that you have for them. Life is so much easier when you treat the people in your life in a respectful way. Instead of hate, you will attract love, and instead of toxic relationships, your internal attitude will attract healthy relationships.
However, other people are not the only ones who you should treat with respect. A truly desirable man treats himself with the same respect that he treats other people with.
3. They love women
It was Zan Perrion, one of the greatest romancers of this day and age, who said that a man who loves women and proclaims it to the world is loved by women. It is quite shocking to see how many male bloggers write about women as if they were the enemy. The problem is that a man who regards women as his enemy will never be able to attract emotionally healthy women in his life, which eventually leads to more frustration and hate.
In the same was that you don’t want to date a woman who hates men, a woman doesn’t want to date a man who hates women. If you want to become a man who is desired by women, you have to rethink your attitude towards them and learn to love them. Women are amazing, intelligent, and loving human beings who deserve your love.
4. They do work that matters
If you work in a job you hate and nobody in your company cares about what you are doing, you should prepare yourself for a change. We men want to build, establish, and grow things. When we do work that doesn’t matter to us, the flame that enlightens our passionate and creative side has not enough oxygen to survive. If we miss this piece of the puzzle, our life feels empty.
A desirable man doesn’t waste his time with work that doesn’t have any meaning for him and the people who pay him to do it. He doesn’t settle for a job until he finds something meaningful.
5. They value a supportive relationship
Some men are so desperate that they don’t care if they have a supportive girlfriend or a girlfriend who doesn’t support them on their journey, as long as they have one. Some men are not ready for love and will subconsciously sabotage every fulfilling relationship they have.
A desirable man doesn’t do that. As the great man you are, you value a supportive relationship. You are not afraid of love and commitment, even though so many other men are absolutely terrified of this emotional cocktail. You are ready to settle down with a truly amazing woman who supports you on your journey, and you appreciate every second you spend with her.
6. They follow their own path
There are a lot of distractions on the path to success, but a great man ignores those distractions and follows his own path. As a desirable man, you listen to the opinions of your family members and friends and you thank them for their input, but in the end you always follow your heart.
If your intuition tells you to turn left and your parents tell you to turn right because they think that this way is safer, you should always turn left. Follow your path and you will eventually reach your harbor.
7. They are willing to take risks
If there is no risk, there is no reward. No matter what you want to achieve in life, you have to take risks to get it. That’s why women are magically drawn to ambitious men and often mistakenly labeled as gold diggers. They are not attracted to men who are financially successful, but to men who have the potential to become successful. If you are a potential winner, you will get the first prize.
This can be the girl of your dreams, the house of your dreams, or the fast car that you dreamed of when you were a little boy. The only way to get any of those things is by taking risks, and the only way to become a desirable man is by being a risk-taker.
8. They have a plan for life
Do you have a plan? Most men don’t. A lot of guys don’t take the time to think about what they really want in life. They have absolutely no clue how the hell they ended up in the position they are in and where the journey will take them. If you ask them where they see themselves in ten years they can’t give you an answer. Don’t be that kind of guy.
No woman wants to be together with a guy who has no idea if he will be homeless in ten years or president of the United States of America. Take your time and think about your next destination. Once you know where the journey will take you, women want to follow you until you reach your destination.
9. They are emotionally strong
A man who is desired by women doesn’t cry when something doesn’t work out the way he planned. He doesn’t sink into depression as soon as he fails. Instead, he analyzes why it didn’t work and he finds a way to make it work. In order to belong to the group of highly desirable men, you have to be emotionally strong.
You can’t be a guy who falls down like a tree without roots as soon as you have to overcome an obstacle, yet still expect women to admire you. Your emotional strength is the proof that you are a man who is able to survive the pitfalls of life. I hope you know that women want survivors.
10. They make an impact on the world
A truly desirable man is a man who doesn’t only care about his own life, but who also cares about the lives of the people around him. He wants to make an impact and he doesn’t plan to leave the world without changing a few lives.
There are many ways to make an impact on the world. You can either contribute by supporting charity projects, or you can contribute by helping people to achieve their goals by mentoring and supporting them. No matter what path you choose, giving back and helping others is the greatest gift that you can give to the world. In return, you will get more than you could possibly ask for.
Set a goal for yourself
"If a long distance relationship survives, it'll only grow stronger. So I'm going to make it work."
Being an only child has a lot of associations that come along with this role, but they are often not true. Growing up as an only child has many benefits that people often are not aware of unless they are one themselves. Here are some truths that will help clear up any misconceptions once and for all about this often misunderstood population.
We are not all spoiled brats
This common misconception is often unfairly put upon us, but it is not entirely true. Parents of only children are quite aware of drawbacks of having a spoiled only child and often are stricter than they would be if they had more than one child. If we did not do as well as we could on our report card, we knew our parents would not let it go lightly. But if we did exceptionally well on a test we knew our parents would reward our hard work with a dinner at our favorite restaurant or an extra hour of television.
We are not socially awkward
Being an only child does not mean that you do not know how to interact with your peers, just because you not grow up with siblings. Instead, we learned appropriate social interactions through spending time with our friends and classmates, just as most children do. We also have cousins and best friends who often feel like they could be our brothers and sisters, since we have known them for as long as we can remember.
We do not mind being alone
Growing up as an only child means that we are very comfortable being alone. We find eating in a restaurant solo or seeing a movie sans company as something that is enjoyable and not in the least bit stressful. Our often introverted nature means that we prefer to have time to ourselves to recharge, but that does not mean we do not enjoy the company of a good friend or a group of close pals every so often.
We come off as “old souls”
Being raised as the only child often means that you appear wise beyond your years, having spent most of your home life with adults. We are mature for our age and often give advice or have a perspective that may seem surprising coming from such a young person. We also enjoy music from the past and television shows that are parents enjoy, simply because this is what we were exposed to growing up.
We prefer competing against ourselves
We may be hard-working, but we dislike competition. We prefer competing against ourselves to beat our personal best, rather than trying to beat someone else. Growing up, we gravitated toward more creative hobbies like art or drama, than the ultra-competitive world of sports.
Love This Article? Share With Your Friends
Most men make a few mistakes before they find a girl who is perfect for them. There are lots of things that you find out while you are with someone; for example they could be selfish or extremely high maintenance.
This can result in you feeling sad and unloved, but as you grow older you become more aware of what you want in a relationship. The perfect girl is out there – maybe you have already found her?
Check out 10 signs that your girlfriend is one of the coolest in the world.
1. She is independent
No one wants to become a part-time carer for their partner, but some partners can be so needy and clingy that you end up feeling like their babysitter. A great girlfriend is independent and strong; instead of needing you there, she simply wants you to be there because she enjoys your company. Without you, her life doesn’t fall apart; she just gets on with it.
2. She is interesting
You and your girlfriend should be able to have conversations that last for hours and truly interest you. A relationship can last a lifetime, so it is important to find a girlfriend who interests and excites you.
3. She gets on well with your family and friends
Your girlfriend should be interested in your personal life, and she should be keen to meet the other people in your life. Even if she isn’t BBF with your little brother, it should be obvious that she is trying to love the people that you love.
4. She is intelligent
Your girlfriend should open your mind up to new ideas and perspectives, teaching you new things while making you question what you already know. This is important for any long-term relationship; without intelligence conversation is difficult, and without conversation it is likely that the relationship will turn sour.
5. She is there for you when you are feeling low
Your girlfriend is the one person who you can go to after a seriously hard day. She is the person who will listen to you vent before offering a much-needed hug. If your girlfriend is dismissive of your problems, there may be deeper problems in the relationship.
6. She respects you
Respect is one of the most important aspects of a relationship. A great girlfriend won’t share your secrets with others, and she won’t try to push you around. It is worth noting that the respect must be mutual; you give respect to earn it.
7. She makes you want to be a better person
When you meet someone truly amazing, they will inspire and motivate you to a be a better person. From advancing your career to becoming more compassionate, there are endless ways that your girlfriend can motivate you to be better.
8. She accepts your individual interests
In a relationship, both partners will have their own individual interest. An awesome girlfriend will encourage you to follow your interests, and she will continue to pursue her own. No matter how much she loves you, she understands that you love other things too.
9. She makes you laugh
Laughing is the ultimate sign of happiness, and your girlfriend should regularly crack you up. Relationships have highs and lows; without someone who can make you laugh, the lows will be a lot more noticeable.
10. She loves you for who you are
A great girlfriend doesn’t want to change her boyfriend. She will embrace all of his quirky traits, and she will even find them cute. If your girlfriend is trying to change you, it might be a sign that you two aren’t well suited. The girl who is loves you for you will never try to change who you are.
Love This Article? Share With Your Friends
To continue to be mentally strong in today’s society is a challenge in itself. We all carry emotional scars and if they’re not healed we can inflict our insecurities, biases, frustration and pain onto others. However, everyone has the potential to heal, change and become better than they were. Although, it will take a lot of work on your part.
In order to be mentally stronger every day, there are a few things you should incorporate in your daily agenda.
1. Be thankful and show gratitude
I like to start my day off with being thankful. I wake up and I say a few word of thanks to my creator for the simple things in life. It doesn’t matter if you have a religion or not, you can still be thankful for things that you have in your life. Why wait till Thanksgiving every year to be thankful? There are so many things to be thankful for every day.
Every day you wake up gives you a new day to start over and claim the life you desire and deserve. It’s important for you to learn to be thankful, in order for you to become mentally stronger daily. Life will deal you some hard times but in order for you to champion through it, you must learn to be thankful for the little things in life. It’s like looking at the glass and feeling that it is half full: be optimistic. Showing gratitude to others is about showing some form of appreciation. You can say your grateful but showing someone you are grateful can go a really long way. For example, why do you think it is suggested to send a thank you card after an interview? This is because as a visual element it sticks a little bit better in the mind than quick fleeting words of thanks. It doesn’t mean that the person expects something in return when they do something, sometimes it just lifts your spirits to know you are appreciated. A simple handmade card or letter with genuinely expressed gratitude, detailing why you are grateful, could make a huge impact.
2. Meditate
Yes, I know! You have probably heard about meditating a million times by now. Meditation is said to improve focus, mental clarity and reduce or eliminate stress. That is how meditation can make you mentally stronger every day. It can also give you peace, which I feel is desperately needed in today’s society. As a beginner, you will possibly notice how busy your mind is zipping about with your to-do lists, ideas, worries and more. Don’t worry, over time your mind will quite down with continued practice.
3. Exercise
Release those endorphins. That’s right! Working out is, of course, important to be mentally stronger every day. You can pick the fitness activity of your choice soccer, hiking, skating, tennis, or whatever you choose. I would encourage you to make it fun and include someone as your workout partner if you don’t prefer to exercise alone.
4. Eat healthy
Fueling your cells with the proper energy (healthy food) is vital for being mentally stronger every day. I’m aware that some of you out there may not like fruits or vegetables. However, can you truly say you have tried every fruit or vegetable? Probably not! There are so many different types of fruits and veggies and they can be prepared in so many different ways. Every fruit and vegetable has its own unique nutritious purpose that it can provide to our bodies. I think it’s worth the effort to try to find some creative ways to cook or juice them to your desired taste. If you have a special diet where you don’t eat certain foods or drinks make sure you are not missing out on nutrition through finding other healthy sources for what you need. Whole wheat, vegetables, fruit, grains, nuts, and legumes are some of the things you could incorporate into your diet.
5. Create a Healthy Environment
In order for you to be mentally stronger every day your environment needs to be a healthy one. If your environment lacks structure or organization it can affect your mental strength. You can become quite overwhelmed when your home and bedroom area lacks organization. Create an environment that relaxes you and makes you happy, and include plants for healthy filtered air inside your home. Decorate your bedroom or home with things that will make you feel relaxed, comfortable and happy when you look around.
6. Smile and Show Compassion
You never know what the power of a smile can do for someone. In life, we pass each other and never really know the burdens or struggles life is dealing others and ourselves from moment to moment. It helps to smile and show a little compassion towards others, you may need it yourself one day later in life. When you’re going through something it’s good to smile your way through it and force yourself to think of anything positive that could come from the situation. To be a mentally stronger person every day make smiling, laughter (not at someone else’s expense), joy, and compassion a part of your daily life.
7. Take Responsibility
Take responsibility for your actions, apologize (genuinely) and move on (even if society does not). Being in denial or lying can hold you back from growing stronger mentally every day. It can also destroy relationships with business partners, friends, family, and spouses.
8. Write in a Journal Daily
Writing in a journal daily is also a way to help you become mentally stronger every day. Journal writing allows you to reflect on your activities for the day. It can include what you have experienced, your feelings, concerns or anything you wish. It could be therapeutic, sometimes we hold our feelings inside and that is not healthy. I use my journal to write daily what I am thankful for, things I achieved that day and other topics. Journals can allow you to see your development over a period of time as a person and appreciate your journey.
9. Power Off Before Bed
In today’s society, some of us are glued to our phones, computers, and other devices. Before you go to sleep you should power them off. Your bedroom should be for sleeping, but so many of us turn our beds into an office. We do this by using our laptops in our bed and taking business calls from our bed at night as well. I understand that with some professions you are always on call. However, your sleep time is precious and your body needs it in order to replenish its own power. Powering off your devices will help you be mentally stronger every day.
10. Know Yourself and Be a Better Version of Yourself
You are not very likely to be a mentally stronger person if you live your life trying to imitate or be someone else. We are all made different and have different journeys for a reason. The sooner you discover the gifts and beauty you were created to offer the world, the more beautiful you will be to the world because you will be more confident and happy.
Plus, it is really unhealthy to live your life and model it obsessively after someone else; it may create envy and jealousy within you towards that person. So if you find yourself constantly thinking about what someone else has and what you don’t, you should evaluate why it matters so much to you. Are you possibly insecure? Everybody has problems, even the Joneses, so why would you try to keep up with them? Get to know yourself and become a better version of yourself, it will make you mentally stronger every day.
Do you think you are mature in relationships? Relationships can come with their own unique struggles, but there are some things that are universally immature and worth avoiding for a happier relationship.
Check out 15 things mature women don’t do in relationships.
1. They Don’t Sacrifice Other Relationships
Many people drift apart from their friends during a relationship. While this is understandable during the initial ‘honeymoon’ period, it is important to remember that that your friends and family have been in your life for far longer than your partner. Mature women make sure they have a happy balance between all of their loved ones.
2. They Don’t Forget To Thank Their Partner
After you have been in a relationship for a while, it can be easy to forget to appreciate all of the little things that they do for you. Mature women realize that sharing your life with someone is a gift – so don’t forget to say please and thank you!
3. They Don’t Give Up Financial Independence
No matter how well off your partner is, completely giving up your financial independence can actually mean giving up your independence. Mature women don’t have to ask their partner for everything – it makes them feel proud and happy to be able to buy things with their own money.
4. They Don’t Focus On Their Partner’s Bad Traits
Mature women try to focus on their partner’s best traits rather than the negative ones. They focus on the good things their partner does and says, and they try not to judge their partner for their flaws, instead understanding that they too have flaws.
5. They Don’t Give Up Their Dreams
Mature women understand that a great relationship doesn’t drag you down – instead, it should bring out the best in you. A good relationship encourages you to pursue your dreams, and a mature woman would struggle to be happy in a relationship if she stopped following her dreams.
6. They Don’t Think Their Version Of Happiness Is The Only One
Mature women understand that everyone’s idea of happiness is different. If their partner enjoys space, they give it to them, and if they enjoy affection, they give them that instead. Most importantly, they do not make assumptions about how to make their partner happy.
7. They Don’t Give Up Their Self Respect
It is normal to change slightly during a relationship, but mature women don’t allow their relationships to take away their self-respect. They don’t allow their partners to speak to them negatively or condescendingly – they expect their partner to treat them just as well as everyone else in their life.
8. They Don’t Take “I Love You” Lightly
Mature women understand the importance of those three words, so they work hard to keep the words special, no matter how long they have been with their partner. They don’t say ‘I love you’ at the end of every conversation – instead they say it at the right moments, to show their partner how much they appreciate them.
9. They Don’t Give Up Their Happiness
Mature women understand the importance of their happiness, and that if they are not happy in a relationship, they shouldn’t be in one. They are aware that their partner is a part of their happiness, and should be someone who can bring them happiness when they are feeling sad.
10. They Don’t Feel Like They Need To Always Be In Contact With Their Partner
Mature women do not need constant contact in their relationships, as they have their own busy lives. They are secure enough to trust their partner when they are not with them, and find non-stop emailing and texting to be a waste of their own time.
11. They Don’t Let Their Partner Make All The Decisions
In a mature relationship both partners respect each others decisions. This can range from big decisions, such as getting married and having children, to smaller ones, like which restaurant to eat at tonight. Either way, your partner should always consider and respect your decisions – and vice versa!
12. They Don’t Share Their Relationship With The World
Mature women understand the value of keeping their relationship between themselves and their partner. They dislike the idea of the world knowing their business, so they avoid discussing their arguments on social media and instead focus on communicating with their partner to solve the problem.
13. They Don’t Give Up Their Space
Mature women know that no matter how great their relationship is, they still occasionally need time alone. From going to the gym to curling up with a good book, mature women value their time alone and actively seek out ‘me-time’.
14. They Don’t Resent Their Partner’s Achievements
Mature women understand that loving someone means you want them to be as happy as possible. They embrace their partner’s happiness and celebrate their achievements with them, rather than holding their partners back for more selfish reasons.
15. They Don’t Give Up Their Identity
When you start a new relationship, it is normal to become interested in your partner’s hobbies and interests. It can be a lot of fun to share interests together, but mature women do not let themselves lose their own interests and hobbies for someone else. Instead, they remain interested in both their partner’s hobbies and their own.
Can you think of anything else that mature women don’t do in relationships? Comment your ideas below!
Most of us remember a crazy relationship we were in, or a time we acted crazy toward someone we love. Looking back, it’s often difficult to remember what our mindset was in that moment. We ask ourselves, “Did I really act like that?” I wish I knew more then than I know now about how to be a better partner, son, and friend.
The sad reality is that we just aren’t taught how to be mentally strong when faced with adversity. The good news is that it’s never too late to start. Here are 10 things mentally strong people DON’T do when it comes to relationships.
1. They don’t analyze everything
Mentally strong people don’t analyze the meaning behind everything someone else does. As an introvert, I pride myself on my ability to find the deeper meaning in life. But I caution you not to get to caught up in analyzing everything! Sometimes a head scratch is just a head scratch. (It doesn’t mean they are bored with you and would rather be with someone else.)
2. They don’t believe the other person will “complete” them
Mentally strong people complete themselves before they look for someone else to enhance their lives. You have to enjoy your own company first and nobody else can replace that part of you. Many people live their lives as if they were a character in a romantic comedy, and believe that they must eat, sleep, and breath their partner. Mentally strong people remind themselves they are complete just the way they are.
3. They don’t bring up the past to justify the present
Mentally strong people don’t bring up the past to win an argument or use it as relationship collateral. They try to work toward improving the relationship in that moment, instead of bringing up past events to justify their actions. Mentally strong people seek to live in the moment by understanding that the past has its place but will never solve today’s problems.
4. They don’t look outside the relationship to improve the relationship
Mentally strong people devote their full attention to themselves and their partner, when it comes to fixing problems in the relationship. They don’t seek another person to fulfill their needs. They don’t become distant and justify their behavior by looking outside of the relationship to feel better about themselves. They don’t engage in destructive behavior to avoid the inevitable.
5. They don’t put the other person down to feel better about themselves
Mentally strong people understand that you don’t treat other people this way. It’s a lot easier to blame someone else for the way you act or feel, instead of looking at why you react the way you do. Mentally strong people know that the only way to have a successful relationship is to lift the other person up, not put them down in order to temporarily feel better about themselves.
6. They don’t stop communicating
Mentally strong people communicate with others in the good times and in the bad. They don’t avoid conversations that need to be had. They seek to better understand their partner, instead of avoiding topics that are uncomfortable or awkward. The mentally strong don’t avoid things because they are uncomfortable, but rather look at these situations as welcome opportunities to improve the relationship.
7. They don’t stop loving themselves
Mentally strong people love themselves first, so they can love other people, not the other way around. Mentally strong people spend time improving their lives first, before they try and help anyone else. They know that by radiating love, it will only help the relationship succeed. Mentally strong people put themselves first.
8. They don’t believe they can fix the other person
Mentally strong people help their partners in any way they can, but they understand that they cannot change the other person. Only an individual can change them self. Mentally strong people don’t live in the future and convince themselves that if only they put enough effort or time into someone, then that person will change. Moreover, mentally strong people seek to understand the other person’s perspective, before they try and offer them advice.
9. They don’t try to make relationships progress faster
Mentally strong people accept that the relationship will develop in the right way. Of course, there are ways to improve the relationship and develop a deeper understanding of one another. However, mentally strong people know deep down that they can’t force something that will take time to develop. They give up control and surrender to the natural progression of the relationship.
10. They don’t stay in unhealthy relationships
Mentally strong people know when a relationship of any kind is no longer working. Not only do they look out for themselves, but they look out for the other person by communicating clearly. They understand that they’ve put in as much time and effort as they could, but would rather spend that time on someone who is right for them. The mentally strong know that everything will work out just fine.
It’s a lot easier to find fault in someone else, especially when we become vulnerable and trust someone we love. I encourage you to be mentally strong first, then ro seek someone who complements who you already are. Only through self discovery can we better understand the types of people who will enhance our lives.
To successfully improve any relationship, you no longer seek to change the other person, but you will instead seek to continually enhance a long and prosperous life together.
