10 Reasons Why You Should Date A Martial Artist

Martial arts aren’t all about breaking boards and breaking arms; martial artists have also been known to break their own fair share of hearts. But don’t let that stop you, because men and women who practice martial arts offer a ton of great benefits to potential partners. Want to find out more about why your next lover should be a black belt, or at least halfway there?

1. They have high confidence levels.
People who engage in regular martial arts often carry themselves a little differently. Look at guys like Steven Seagal, Bruce Lee, or pretty much any current UFC champ and you will realize something right away: these guys are oozing with confidence. Whether you are a female or a male, there are few things more attractive than being with a person who is supremely confident that they can take care of themselves and protect those that they care about.

2. They have small or nonexistent egos.
Arrogance is actually the result of low self-confidence and insecurity. Sure, the wanna-be tough guy walking around flexing at the gym looks “tough,” but he is probably just a scared little boy inside of a balloon suit. When a person is unsure of who they are and lacks self-confidence, they often walk around puffing out their chest, criticizing others, and acting tough in order to project an image of confidence. Someone with confidence is attractive, but someone with an ego twice the size of Texas is just about as annoying as a rock in your shoe. Ego is the false projection of confidence, and it almost always leads to bad things.

3. They are fit.
People involved in the martial arts are almost always physically fit. I know from being a competitor at some of the largest Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu competitions in the world that most of the people walking around are sporting six-packs and bulging biceps. Personally, I trained up to 6 hours a day at times, and with that much working out, you are bound to get fit in the process. Martial artists often treat their bodies like a temple and avoid things that will detract from their health. They are always active in some way or another.

4. They are better lovers.
Not only do martial artists have better stamina from being in great shape, but people in the martial arts are often much more in touch with their bodies, more balanced, more flexible, and more in tune with the bodies and reactions of others. I am going to keep this article PG, so I will let your imagination run wild with that one for moment.

5. They have more discipline.
Martial artists not only discipline their bodies through drilling, hard exercise, and physical conditioning, but they also learn to control their minds as well. Martial artists must develop the power to force themselves to do things that are uncomfortable. They must continue to train even when they are tired, sore, or getting beaten. A true warrior of the martial way has to learn to be in control of themselves at all times, and it helps them to develop tremendous personal discipline. Are you bad with diet, budget, or setting goals? Find a martial artist. They can probably teach you a thing or two.

6. They are better listeners.
Martial arts require a high degree of concentration and focus in order to excel at practice or competition. The same powers of concentration that allow a warrior to seize an arrow out of the air or dodge a punch will allow your new partner to listen to your problems, offer solutions, and be a shoulder to lean on in tough times.

7. They are happier people.
Have you ever wanted someone who just rolls with the punches, passes through life, and encourages you to smile all the time? A martial artist is a person who often takes things lightly, learns to exist within the flow of life, and finds joy in the small and passing moments that many of us take for granted. Who doesn’t want to date someone who is happy? More confidence, less ego, less anger, and a quiet dedication to the body and the mind: all these things make a martial artist a happier person.

8. They are gentle and slow to anger.
The martial way is not one of violence and bloodshed, but rather one of patience, virtue, and peace. A true warrior doesn’t go around provoking fights or arguments, but avoids confrontation and fighting when possible. I don’t know about all martial artists, but I know my instructor won’t even kill a spider that walks out onto the mat, and I am the same way. I am not saying that a martial artist is someone to walk on, just that they probably are the last person that will start screaming in your face.

9. They are honest.
The martial way is one of humility, respect, and honesty. Martial artists often dedicate their lives to cultivation of their spirits, bodies, and minds, and along with these pursuits, they must learn to develop strong core values and beliefs. A person with integrity—a clear focus on what they believe and value—is much more likely to be honest than a person who has no purpose in life.

10. They are dedicated, faithful, and loyal.
Martial artists often devote their lives to those closest to them. Along with their strong values comes a strong sense of belonging and responsibility for and towards those they love and care about. A martial artist sees him or herself as a tool to protect honesty, integrity, wisdom, truth, and all things good in the world. If a lifelong practitioner of the martial arts tells you they want to be with you forever, you better believe they mean it. They will probably stick with you through fights, adversity, challenges, temptations, and anything else life can throw your way.

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10 Reasons To Love An Empowered Woman

If you are looking for someone you can pour out your love to, let me suggest the empowered woman. The empowered woman knows what she wants, knows how to get it, knows how to live fully, and she knows how to love you back without needing anyone’s approval or recognition.  An empowered woman is unarguably one of the most magnificent beings you will ever come in contact with.  Read on and find 10 reason why you should absolutely love and embrace the empowered women in your life! .

1. She knows how to love you in return
It is difficult to give what you don’t have. It is impossible to love someone and feel fulfilled when they can’t love you in return because they don’t love themselves.  This will never happen to you when you love an empowered woman.  She loves herself (not in a narcissistic manner). In turn, she appreciates who you are and loves you in return. She will love you just like you deserve to be loved.

2. She will inspire you
When life puts you down and you are at the end of your rope, the empowered woman will be there to see you through.  Her drive, enthusiasm and (at times) hopeless optimism will inspire you to carry on despite the obstacles you face.

3. She is not afraid of failure
While many out there are thoroughly terrified of failure, the empowered woman understands that failures are simply stepping stones in life.  How can you not love someone that is thoroughly unafraid to try, fail, and give it a shot all over again?!

4. She is all about the legacy
While most people are focused on the car, the house, the job, and corner office; the empowered woman is focused on leaving a legacy that will inspire others and change the world.  The empowered woman is focused on empowering others to maximize their potential and fulfill their purpose. She is all about inspiring others to look beyond themselves and live a life of service to others.
 
5. She can laugh at her mistakes…
…and learn from them as well! She understands mistakes are part of the journey. The empowered woman can laugh and learn from her mistakes to ensure they never happen again.
 
6. She can be vulnerable
The empowered woman understands there is no debt in relationships without vulnerability. Although she is emotionally strong, she is willing to laugh and cry with you because all of these emotions are an essential part of life.

7. She can speak her mind
While everyone else is too concerned with what others may think or say, the empowered woman is not afraid to speak her mind.  She understands that her value comes from within, not from what others say or think about her.

8. She knows when to remain quiet
She lives by Abe Lincoln’s words, “Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubt.”

9. She knows how to have fun
Whether it is at the symphony or at a ball game, the empowered woman understands life is made up of experiences with people – not the places you go. She is able to live in the moment and enjoy it fully without being concerned for the future. After all, who’s got a guaranteed future?

10. She is not afraid of change
While most people rather continue on living unfulfilled lives as long as their comfort zone remains intact, the empowered woman is all about embracing change.  She understands growth cannot happen without change. She understands that change is the gift life offers you to choose your destiny. Therefore, she is not afraid of change because it is her stepping stone towards success.

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25 Romantic Fall Date Ideas

Fall is the perfect time of year for romantic, cuddle-worthy dates and begins when the center of the sun crosses the earth’s equator. Daylight begins to wane in the Fall and there are more hours spent in darkness as winter approaches. The weather begins to cool down, affording couples the opportunity to snuggle indoors — or seek adventure outside amidst the turning, multicolored leaves.

There are many unique reasons why Autumn is the perfect time for dating. Fall is when testosterone is naturally highest in both men and women, which increases the desire for closeness, making a successful date more likely. Also, when comparing the seasonal patterns of relationships in Facebook profiles, Fall is the time of year when more people who are single switch their status to “In a Relationship” or “Engaged” than the yearly average. Fall is a great season for outdoor activities because the heat is not unbearable, and the turning leaves and smell of chimney smoke and autumnal spices in the air all make for a great backdrop for a romantic date. There are many things you can do during Fall that you can’t do at other times of year and you should definitely take advantage of that. Autumn, therefore, is the perfect time to consider asking your crush out!

Here are 25 unique and romantic “Fall Date Ideas” designed to inspire connection and conversation.

•     Visit a local pumpkin patch. Choose a pumpkin together, and carve it.

•     Take a trip to an orchard and go apple picking.

•     Fall is the perfect time for wine tasting — just make sure you have a designated driver for safety reasons.

•     Stay indoors and watch cheesy Halloween classics like Hocus Pocus and Casper.

•     Make popcorn balls and devour them as you watch Netflix.

•     Go for a hike amidst the autumn leaves.

•     Pack a picnic filled with seasonal foods and head to a local lookout for a casual, yet fun date.

•     If you both like horror, head to a haunted maze and travel through the terror together.

•     Attend a “Date and Paint Night”. Dine on seasonal goodies and paint a fall inspired scene!

•     For foodies: Track down gourmet food trucks, see if you can find an appetizer, entree, and dessert that each include pumpkin as an ingredient!

•     Autumn is perfect for bonfires — take your sweetie to one and stay cozy as you make s’mores!

•     Head to a local coffee house and share a Pumpkin Spice Latte or apple cider.

•     Go on a hay ride together — be sure to bring a blanket to share and keep warm!

•     Attend a local Farmer’s Market and pick out some delicious produce.

•     Have a blast picking out Halloween costumes together.

•     Go bobbing for apples at a country fair.
•     Go horseback riding or rent a horse-drawn carriage for a romantic ride through the park.

•     Find a purportedly haunted location and visit it to see if you can catch evidence of paranormal activity.

•     Build a gingerbread house together and decorate with Halloween candy!

•     Make and decorate caramel apples!

•     Celebrate Oktoberfest.

•     Watch a local football game.

•     Check out a brewery for a seasonal craft beer tasting.

•     Go bird watching together — Autumn is when birds begin their annual migrations!

•     Go Geocaching and enjoy the hunt for treasure as you take in the sights and smells of Fall.

When thinking about a romantic date the most important thing to consider is choosing an activity that both of you can enjoy together. Make an effort and get to know the person ahead of time if possible. Then, pick something that will be both memorable and magical.

What amazing, unique and romantic fall dates have you gone on?

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13 Ways To Make Your Partner Feel Important (So Your Relationship Has A Chance)

My husband and I have been together for almost nine years now. That’s almost a third of my life! Although we’re still madly in love we do have our moments. In particular, when I was in college I was so wrapped up in my own studies, work and our daughter, that my marriage was quickly falling apart and I didn’t even notice! My husband, who was also busy with work, did notice and he felt as if I just didn’t care about him anymore.

He had valid reason to think so. I spent so much time studying and trying to juggle everything else that I really didn’t give him the attention, love and care that he deserved. Eventually, that led to fights and arguments until I understood why he was so mad. I promised myself to make him feel important again, because he is, and we’re doing better than ever.

Sometimes when you’re married for a long time other things take priority over your husband. With kids, work, friends, household chores and responsibilities, along with your own hobbies and interests, your relationship will occasionally fall to the wayside as you spend time doing other things. It happens and that’s okay, but if you’re not careful, you and your husband may begin to drift apart.

There will be days, sometimes weeks, where you’re too busy to go out or even spend quality time together at home. That’s normal, but a prolonged emotional distance and time spent apart can cause some serious relationship damage.

It’s crucial to make your loved one feel important on a daily basis if you want your relationship to last. And they should make you feel important, too. Although it can be very easy to make someone feel loved and important, it can also be something that’s forgotten if you don’t put any effort in at all – a difficult lesson I had to learn.

1. Ask him about his day.

After so many years with someone, asking about their day can seem trivial. I mean, don’t we already know what they do for work and yadda-yadda? That might so, but taking the time to ask him about his day shows you care and that you’re thinking about him.

My husband and I make it a priority to ask one another about our days. Not only do we ask, we actually listen and show interest, and that is key! You have to actually pay attention! And because it’s something you can do every day over dinner it’s easy to actually remember to do it.

2. Talk about him.

It’s been proven that a person’s favorite topic to talk about is themselves, so why not let him? Let him talk about his day, his hobbies, his friends and favorite things. Then ask him questions about those things and keep him talking! He’ll love it and think to himself that his wife really cares.

3. Show genuine interest in his passions.

It’s great when you and your husband have similar interests; it gives you something to talk about and activities to do together. For example, my husband and I enjoy thrift shopping, going to concerts and browsing art galleries. However, he still has hobbies and interests that I don’t share with him and vice versa. He enjoys playing darts, watching documentaries and has a deep love for all things (including the lifestyle) from the mid-century. And I enjoy spending time outdoors, creating art and playing board games.
Although my husband would rather grab a pint at the pub and shoot some pool over hiking, he still joins me now and again for a walk in the woods, and I’ll join him for a drink. More importantly, I’ll ask him questions about things he enjoys and actually listen. (Remember when I said people like to talk about themselves?)

Even if you don’t necessarily care for his passions and hobbies, you should at least show some interest. Nothing makes someone feel more important than when you want to talk about them and the things they enjoy. And who knows? Maybe you’ll actually find a new hobby or passion in the process. I know I have.

4. Don’t criticize or complain.

No matter who someone is, it’s quite possible they will do things we don’t like. Little quirks and habits are things that all couples have to deal with over the years, but at some point there will be something that comes up that you just can’t stand. No matter what that is, how you handle it is the important part.

The first thing to do is to try and understand him and his point of view. If it’s something that you need to talk about it, go ahead and talk about it, but instead of criticizing and complaining make sure to be understanding and forgiving.

5. Let him vent.

Everyone has a bad day now and then, and he will, too. It can frustrating to listen to someone vent their problems but if you want him to feel important you should take the time to listen. Not only that, but try not to invalidate his feelings or even try to solve his problems. Truth is, he just wants someone to listen to him.

6. Show your appreciation.

Did you know people like to feel appreciated? Of course. They like to feel valued, cared about, needed, wanted and loved. One way to show your husband that you feel all of these things is to take note of his good qualities and give him sincere appreciation.

Is he a good cook? Does he always brush the snow off your car in the winter? Or maybe he likes to surprise you with flowers? Don’t let the little things go unnoticed!

Showing your appreciation can be done in a number of ways. It can be shown with a hug, in a written note, or a simple kind gesture, but of course, a simple thank you will always do.

7. Show gratitude.

Whenever you find yourself becoming frustrated with your husband try to write out a list of all the things about him that you’re grateful for. This list can include whatever you want on it and it will help remind you of all the reasons you love him. Then, from time to time, let him know about the things that you’re grateful for.

Does he cook you dinner most nights? Be grateful! Is he a great listener? Be grateful. Does he make you feel special? Be grateful! And don’t just write it down, let him know that you are grateful for him. You may think that he already knows, but even still he actually might need to hear the words or be shown, and it will mean the world to him.

8. Be affectionate.

In a newer relationship affection seems to be something that just happens naturally. New couples can’t seem to stop touching each other, whether it’s holding hands or something more. Unfortunately in most cases as the relationship develops couples often stop being as affectionate as when they first started dating.

In my own experience, one of the quickest ways to kill a relationship is to neglect each other physically. Being affectionate with one another will make both of you feel more comfortable and connected, but without it, you may feel distant and cold and not even know why.

There are a lot of different ways to show affection, and it’s not just about sex. It can be as simple as a good morning kiss, holding hands while walking down the street, or even sitting next to one another on the couch. Not to mention, there’s also cuddling, spooning in bed, massaging one another, and joking around.

In order to keep your love and passion alive, and make one another feel important, remember to show your affection regularly!

9. Respect each others opinions.

Most of the couples I know share a lot of the same values and opinions. Still, there are things that two people just won’t agree on. It might be something as small as agreeing what the best restaurant is, or even something more serious like who to vote for. Chances are though, that it won’t be a complete deal breaker.

When you don’t agree with something, the best thing to do is agree to disagree. Fighting about it usually won’t change the other persons opinion, it will only make the both of you angry. You can, however, discuss it as long as you respect the other persons opinion, keep an open-mind, be honest and in the end, remember that you are both entitled to your own thoughts and opinions. By showing you respect his opinion, you make him feel important.

10. Accept his family.

There are a lot of jokes in TV sit-coms and in life about parent-in-laws, and that’s because people can relate! Sometimes your husband’s parents might just infuriate you and your parents might just infuriate him. Still, as his wife, you should really do your best to accept his parents and he yours.

It’s important that you try your best to get along, accept them and be respectful. I’m not saying that you have to like them, but you do have to tolerate them if you want your husband to feel important. So the next time the in-laws are getting on your nerves, keep your mouth shut.

11. Celebrate his successes.

No matter how big or small that success is, celebrating it with him will make him feel important. Got promoted at work? Celebrate! Passed a test? Celebrate! Won a game? Celebrate!

Nothing says you are important to me like a big ol’ cake to celebrate a success. Unless, of course, he prefers beer.

12. Give generously.

How amazing does it feel to receive something, whether it’s someone’s time or a gift? It makes you feel pretty damn important! If you want to make your husband feel important, try giving generously.

I’m not saying you have to go out and buy him a new sports car for his birthday (which would be awesome) but you should try to do nice things for him on the regular.

13. Open up about yourself.

Finally, open up to your husband; open your heart and your mind, and share yourself with him completely. A marriage is different from other relationships and one thing that makes it different is the openness that is shared between the two of you.

There are a lot of different ways to make that special man in your life feel important, but you have to remember to actually do it. And don’t forget, they should make you feel important, too!

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18 Signs That Shows you've Found Your Right Partner

Honestly Speaking, it is said that even before you were born, the name of your Life Partner has been determined. Each soul has a perfect match.... Right Partner.

Although most people think their life partner who will be with them for the rest of their life as a perfect harmonious union of bliss, your right partner is said  to be the person who is intend to help you, i.e “Complete yourself.”

One person is Can't complete his mission in this life alone. Everyone needs someone to help them become a better person.

Being in an honest, sincere, and committed relationship helps you to become a better version of yourself. You have to push yourself beyond your comfort zone, beyond your limits to find your better self.

Sometimes it looks like you do not fit together at all, but soon after a little bit of twisting, turning, and flipping the pieces around, you feel the moment of the perfect click. It’s a feeling deep in your soul, that says, this is the right one.

So, if you are brave enough to move away from your romance checklist, open your eyes and your heart to unexpected possibilities, you might just be one of the lucky ones who finds their true life partner.

You know you've found your Right Partner when:

1. You just know it.
Something deep inside tells you this is the perfect one for you. It’s as if there is a spiritual force pushing you to let go of everything you previously expected and to give of yourself completely.

2. You have crossed paths before.
Sometimes you may not  be connected, but you were in the same place, at the same time. Before my husband and I met, we lived across the street from each other and worked across the street from each other. Yet we never met until the time was right.

3. Your souls meet at the right time.
Each person has to be ready to receive the soul connection. Even though my husband and I were in close proximity of each other for many years, we did not meet until the time was right for both of us. You have to be prepared to meet your soulmate. It could be that you have to go through a relationship that doesn’t work out, or that you’re not ready to ditch your “perfect person checklist,” but when it comes to soulmates- timing is everything.

4. Your quiet space is a peaceful place.
Being quiet together is comforting like a fluffy down blanket on a cold winter night. Whether you are reading in the same room, or driving in the car, there’s a quiet peace between you.

5. You can hear the other person’s silent thoughts.
With soulmates, there is such depth to your relationship that you can feel and hear what your partner is thinking, even if it is not verbally expressed.

6. You feel each other’s pain.
You stand in each other’s shoes. You know each other so well, that the second he walks in the door, you can tell how his day was. You feel each other’s feelings: sadness, worry, and stress. And you share each other’s happiness and joy.

7. You know each other’s flaws and the benefits in them.
Yes, it’s true. Our flaws have benefits. Every trait has a positive as well as a negative side. It’s the task of each person to always look for the good, even when things don’t look so good. There is usually a benefit to each flaw. Stubborn people are good decision makers. Overly organized people are great at paying bills on time.

8.  You share the same life goals.
You’re both on the same page with values, ethics, and goals. You may have a different way of reaching those goals, but you both want the same end result.

9. You’re not afraid of having a conversation.
Conversations can be challenging. Expressing concerns or attempting to make decisions is uncomfortable. Soulmates know that if they join together, they will be able to work it out.

10. You are not threatened by the need for alone time.
Whether it’s tennis three times a week or girls’ night out, you respect each other’s need for independence, knowing that when you get together, your time alone is special.

11. You don’t experience jealousy.
Pretty girls at the office or handsome personal trainers aren’t a threat to your relationship. You are secure knowing that you are the only one.

12. You respect each other’s differences and opinions.
You know you have different opinions. Often soulmates are polar opposite. At times this is challenging. These are the times when you are being forced to let the other person complete you. You still have your own opinion, but instead of agreeing to disagree, there is a deep level of respect for each other. You listen and honor the differences.

13. You don’t scream, curse, or threaten each other with divorce.
Of course you feel the anger. People unintentionally hurt each other. But soulmates aren’t nasty, hurtful, or punitive.

14. You give in because you want to make your partner happy.
Giving can often occur in unhealthy, co-dependent, or abusive relationships. But soulmates give to each other for the sole purpose of making each other happy.

15. You know how to apologize.
It’s not easy to say “I’m sorry” or admit that you did something that hurt the person you love. Soulmates realize that their actions or words cause harm. Even if they feel justified in their point of view, if their partner was hurt by it, they can easily apologize for the harm they have caused.

16. You would marry each other again.
You know this is the one and only one for you. Even through the tough times, you would choose your partner again. You feel a sense of pride in your partner.

17. You complete each other.
Yes, I’m sorry to say it but, your partner fills in your blanks. No person is perfect. We all have our strengths and weaknesses. Soulmates complete each other. It’s the yin and yang of perfect harmony. One person may be the extrovert, while one is the introvert. One may be social, while the other a homebody. Soulmates are often opposite that are attracted to a person who has their missing pieces.

18. Being in each other’s arms washes away all your stress, worries, and anxiety.
There is no place you’d rather be at the end of the day but in each other’s arms. If you had a rough day filled with disagreements, a fight with your boss or if you missed the train, whatever happened is gone the second you cuddle up together. There is a warmth in your heart, an inner peace you can feel. No words need to be spoken. All that exists is the silent, blissful union of two souls together. Two souls that were meant to be together eternally.

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15 Signs You’re In The Right Relationship

Relationships are tricky things. Sometimes they are difficult to navigate. Sometimes you’ve been in one too long to realize it’s not right. Sometimes you get so comfortable with unhappiness that you forget what happiness looks like, or don’t feel like you can do better.

But when you’re in the right relationship, everything is different. The sun shines brighter, your smiles are bigger, and even doing mundane chores becomes more enjoyable. It’s good to have clear signs that you’re in the right relationship, and it’s also good to have tasks that you can work on to improve your relationship. Either way, read on for 15 telltale signs it’s the real deal.

1. You spend time together doing things you both enjoy.
It’s great to do what he likes. It’s great to do what she likes. But what’s even better is to find things you both like, and to do them together. It took us nearly four years of marriage to really find things that we both like, but we’re starting to hit a great stride with things like working out together, mountain biking, playing paintball (yep, she loved it!), and even writing together.

2. You spend time apart, doing things you enjoy.
When you’re in the right relationship, your partner understands that there are things you want to do alone. Maybe he’s a gamer, maybe she loves Pinterest. We all need time to do our own things, and the right relationship is one in which both partners understand and appreciate that about each other.

3. You fight productively.
When you’re in the right relationship, fighting is never about winning. It’s not even about getting your point across (though sometimes it takes that ugly turn). A productive fight is about understanding the other person, finding common ground, compromising, and respecting each other throughout the process. If you end a fight feeling like you’ve won, you’re doing it wrong.

4. You each have your own friends and share friends too.
Some of my friends are in relationships where they only have couple friends. Others only have their own sets of friends. When you’re in the right relationship, you find balance between your social circle, your partner’s, and your shared circle. Missing any of those three elements may be a sign of concern.

5. You maintain self-identity.
You celebrate being you. Your partner does the same. And you appreciate each other more for maintaining your self-identity. In the right relationship both partners are nurtured to continuously improve and develop their “self.”

6. Your friends and family like you together.
One of the easiest ways to know if you’re in the right relationship is to pay attention to the feedback you get from friends and family. Assuming your friends and family want what is best for you, a lot of negative feedback is a bad sign. That doesn’t mean everyone will be enthusiastic about your relationship, but the overall sense you get should be positive.

7. You are able to disagree respectfully.
Some things you wont agree on. It happens. The right relationship isn’t about everything being perfect, but about partners maintaining a high level of respect when things don’t go perfectly. You can disagree. My wife and I disagree often. But what separates our disagreements from others I’ve seen is that we do it respectfully. There are no hurt feelings, no efforts to change the other person’s mind at all costs, nothing like that. We don’t need to agree on everything. And that’s an important realization, because we definitely don’t.

8. You better your partner, and they better you.
My wife makes me better. Her academic pursuits inspired me to further my own. Her writing inspires me to write. My love for running inspired her to start. It’s a back and forth of improving one’s self through the inspiration of the other. We make each other better, and that’s a sure sign that we’re in the right relationship.

9. You share a passion for your future together.
Ever met the guy who just isn’t interested in “settling down”? If you’re dating that guy, you’re doing yourself a disservice. In the right relationship both partners are enthusiastic about a future together. And while not everything lasts forever, partners who share a vision for what their future entails are in a much better position than partners who don’t, or worse, don’t even discuss the topic.

10. You’re attracted to your partner, mind, body, and spirit.
Sure, you’re attracted to them. That attraction is probably the first thing that motivated the pursuit of a relationship. But are you attracted to his mind? Are you attracted to her spirit? Is he the kind of person you could have conversations with years from now when you’re both old and wrinkly? Is she the kind of person whose joy will shine through when her face shows her age? You’re in the right relationship when you’re just as excited about the late night conversations as you are about what happens between the sheets.

11. You keep each other’s secrets.
Do you keep her secrets? Does she keep yours? Are you diligent about protecting your partner’s privacy? This is a small, but very important issue that signifies the level of respect and value you hold for your partner. You’re in the right relationship when you are impressed with how much your partner values protecting your secrets.

12. You make a good team.
Ever been in a kayak with your partner? That’s how I first realized my wife and I had some work to do with regards to being a good team. We couldn’t steer, we were super slow, and we complained a lot because we weren’t working together. We’ve since gotten much better. It’s a silly example, but there is value in it. If you and your partner are already making a good team, you’re in the right relationship.

13. You enjoy doing even mundane tasks together.
Grocery shopping is literally one of my favorite things to do with my wife. I take food seriously, and walking around in the grocery story planning our meals and trying new things is really fun. Even a day of errands and chores can be fun if you’re with the right person. Ask yourself this: Could you enjoy a day cleaning out the garage or attic with your partner? If the answer is yes, you’re in the right relationship.

14. You are compatible sexually.
This probably goes without saying, but I’m going to say it anyway! You aren’t always going to be on the same level. Sometimes you’ll want more, sometimes she will. Sometimes you’ll feel adventurous, sometimes he will. But, generally speaking, you should be compatible with your sexual interests and desires, in quality, quantity, style, and all other characteristics. If you’re a 3–4 times a week kind of person and your partner considers once a week a chore, you might need to reconsider the longevity of your relationship.

15. You share financial goals.
Finances break up even the best of relationships. It’s a good start to share ideas about financial goals, how much income you require to be happy and not stressed, what you want to do about retirement and savings, etc. Strong couples even share budgets and create financial challenges for themselves. If you have your finances in order, you’re probably in the right relationship.

There are many other telltale signs, but these are a few to get you started. Look over the list and do a relationship audit. Does your relationship show signs of being the right one? Are there areas you can improve to get yourself there? Is it time to re-evaluate the relationship you’re in? While these signs may not be universal, they are very telling as to whether or not your relationship even has the legs. Do yourself a favor and really observe your relationship with a keen eye. You may be surprised to find he or she really is the one. Or you may save yourself wasted years and a lot of heartache.

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